March 24, 2009

This Person Could Be Your Match!

This just in from my friend (who really exists), from the online dating trenches. And I do mean trenches, based on who seems to think is an appropriate mate for her:

Now, I'm not one to cast aspersions, but I'll do it anyway:

  1. I think it's obvious to everyone that if this man's photo weren't so closely cropped, his button-down shirt would most certainly be revealed to be a short-sleeved button-down shirt. With a tie. He may or may not also be sporting a pocket protector. The problem is, unlike Zachary Levi (a.k.a. Chuck Bartowski of NBC's Chuck), he is NOT successfully rocking the Nerd Herd look.

  2. He is 20 years older than my friend. Maybe if Liam Neeson (God rest Natasha Richardson's soul...poor family!) were to go back on the market, I could approve of my friend dating such an oldster. But this guy is no Liam Neeson. There, I said it.

  3. Perhaps most importantly, the dude can't take a hint. My friend has already declined his "wink" on a few occasions. I have no idea what that means, but it sounds to me like the lady has made it clear she is not interested. Yet he persists. And his persistence is upsetting her -- so much so that she has sent her friends his photo to aid the police in the investigation in case she goes missing after a routine trip to the mall. NOT COOL!

No comments: